Red Dawn

Matt, Robert, and Jed, top; Jed, Robert, and Matt, bottom.

I would’ve reviewed this movie sooner, but it took them two years to release it. Seriously. Filming wrapped sometime in 2010, but that was right around the time MGM started having financial troubles, so they couldn’t afford to do anything with it. In the intervening time, two of the actors here ended up becoming abruptly much more popular, so maybe it didn’t work out so badly for MGM after all. On the other hand, maybe it did, since I’ve just seen what imdb users are rating it.

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Bond's obituary. Rumors of his death have been greatly exaggerated... again.

Given all the rebooting going on lately, it was inevitable that it would happen to Bond. I know, it happens to Bond all the time, given that he regenerates like a Time Lord, but this one is a more serious reboot than most, even without the usual change in the lead actor. Daniel Craig, most recently of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, doesn’t really seem all that into his role as super-spy for a lot of the movie, though I guess being dead will do that to you.
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Will SMith saves Jason Bateman. Able to flip trapped sedans with a single hand.

John Hancock, to be precise. But this isn’t about a famed signer of the Declaration of Independence. It’s about a drunken lout who lives in a cluttered, tiny trailer in the middle of the desert, but prefers to sleep on park benches with large bottles of whiskey close at hand. He also happens to have super-powers. But those don’t win him an adoring public, like you might expect. In the first three minutes of the movie, he gets called the same insulting thing three times, which quickly becomes the running joke of the film.
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Heartbreak Kid

Ben Stiller at the children's table at a wedding. Yes, the movie was that silly.

So… yeah.

I actually saw this one on the weekend as usual… but I’ve kind of been too stunned to write about it. Usually, I like to do something else for a little while after I leave the theatre, just to sort of let my opinions settle, but this time, I had to wait a really long time so I could try to feel less unclean.

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