Elysium

Matt Damon as Max Da Costa. He can save me anytime.

By 2154, the gap between rich and poor has widened to, oh, about 1,200 miles or so. That’s 1,200 miles straight up, by the way, as anyone you’d call wealthy has moved up to the Elysium space station, a land of trees, rolling hills, swimming pools, and large, pristine houses. Robotic servants tend to everyone’s needs, medical science can heal virtually anything, and life is Perfect.

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The Rite

Anthony Hopkins in full-on exorcism mode.

There’s a scene where Father Xavier (CiarĂ¡n Hinds, Amazing Grace, also soon to be Aberforth Dumbledore in the next Harry Potter flick), while talking to reluctant student Michael Kovak (Colin O’Donoghue), asks him what he thinks of the exorcism class. Now that’s not a question you hear every day. Michael’s reply is that he doesn’t know what to make of it. I mention this because I don’t know what to make of the movie, either.

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Predators

Sniper Alice Braga and her Really Big Gun

Turns out Adrien Brody isn’t so much an action hero, as an action anti-hero. He’s rude, stubborn, and cares more about his giant knife than any of the people he finds himself stranded with. On the other hand, none of those things are all that noticeable, since that description fits pretty much all of the characters in the film.

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Repo Men

Jude Law pointing a gun and looking screaming mad.

Of course it’s easy to talk about the good movies. You leave the theatre still thinking about the film, reminding yourself to let Steve know how good it was, because he’ll love it, maybe even wondering when you’ll be able to buy a copy to watch at home. And it’s easy to talk about the bad movies, too. You want to find someone to vent to about the two hours you just completely wasted, not to mention the cost of the tickets and snacks. Maybe you also want to warn people away.
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